Rachael (2)

It was past 10am. Rachael had told her mother she would be visiting Toyosi and spend the afternoon with her. Since her mother would not tolerate her visiting Eric, she had resulted to lying. What did she get for being honest? Her mother pounded and hounded her and she was really tired of fighting. It was exhausting. Eric would pick her up from Toyosi's house and they would go to the beach for a small get together Eric's friend was organising. She was giddy with excitement and couldn't wait till she was out of the house that was suffocating her. She needed to breathe.

Toyosi's house was bigger than hers with a very large front yard. She loved the serenity that came with the house. Asides the location of the house in GRA (which is the location of the wealthy), she wished she had the freedom that Toyosi had. Toyosi's father was never really around because of business trips but he spoilt her with money. Toyosi had all she wanted and needed. There was no one screaming verses of scripture and disturbing her with the need to attend church activities. Toyosi was third out of four children and two of them had chosen to settle in Sweden. Toyosi would be alone at home at the time she was to meet Eric which was why she agreed to allow them meet at her place. Eric said they would leave for the party around 1pm. She looked at her watch it was almost 11am.

Rachael felt she could surprise Eric at his place instead of going to Toyosi's house. She could hang around there till it was time for the party. Eric was the centre of her world. She wanted to be with him for as long as she could. She remembered their first night together. Though, she wanted to wait like her mother said every good girl should, Eric was not ready to wait for her. She had imagined that it would happen in a cozy environment with dim lights and music but Eric would not wait for such arrangements. It had happened in Eric's friend's truck parked behind a school. Eric had insisted and she had no choice. She felt powerless in his arms. During the act, she felt the eyes of her mother watching her and she trembled with guilt but the pleasure she was experiencing outweighed any feelings of guilt that her good conscience wanted her to feel. After that night, it had become pretty regular. She wondered why it usually happened in odd places. The last time, it happened in Danjuma's market stall. Eric had the keys and took her there not caring about her own preferences. She could not deny that she felt cheap after that but Eric kept reassuring her that his love for her constantly set him on fire. Besides, being Eric's girl was enough. His rugged handsomeness made every girl crave for him. She was a lucky girl, she thought.

Eric's head was bowed. He held his Cigarette tightly between his fingers. He was so angry that the idiot, Dennis would make a fool out of him. Watching him lie on the ground all beaten up was not enough to calm him down. He felt a throbbing headache but the matter at hand needed to be dealt with. Ola paced around the room in giant strides. Eric's room was not tidy because he never really stayed much in his own house. The posters of half naked women were plastered around. His lights were all blue colour giving the room a dark feel. His sound system was opposite the bed and a table top fridge that held all the booze was at the right corner. He really did not keep much in the house.

Dennis was lying almost unconscious on the carpet which needed a change. The floor had not been swept for as long as Eric could remember. He had tied Dennis' hands tied behind him and his breathing had become very unsteady. Marcus, his right hand man laid on the bed with a gun placed on his chest. He just wanted Eric to give him the order and Dennis would be dead. He owed them some money. He had taken merchandize worth over two hundred thousand naira. He had not only refused to pay but he thought he could hide. Eric was not the person to hide from because he had his ways of sniffing out rats from their holes.

"Give me the gun." Eric quietly ordered. "Finally! Jeez...! I was beginning you weren't man enough to end the guy. I don tire to dey look you." Marcus handed the gun over to Eric and stood up. This would be fun. It would send a message to others who thought they could take them for a ride. If Dennis got killed, all who owed them would pay back as soon as possible. The thought of money rolling in and the respect they would get made Marcus more excited. Ola stood now. He was a bit shaken but did not want to show it. He also craved the respect that being part of the gang offered him. His life had been too difficult and joining the gang seemed to make his problems go away. He however never bargained for taking another man's life. "Maybe we should give him some more time, I think after this, he would pay up" Ola said quietly with his head bowed. The silence was broken with the sound of thunder. The rain was warming up for a very big downpour. Marcus eyes glared with anger as he looked at Ola. "Oh boy! When you take join us? Do you know how we roll?" He had to control his rising voice. He felt Eric's hand on his shoulder cautioning him to be quiet. Eric looked at both men. His eyes stone cold. Ola was scared. It was as if a demon had possessed Eric. Eric walked to where Ola stood. Their eyes locked for five seconds. Eric turned. His hands held the gun at the perfect angle. A shot was fired. "Hi Eric!" The door opened. Rachael gasped. Her bag dropped. The world stopped. Marcus waited for Eric to do the needful. Eric was dumbfounded. Rachael was at the gate, her hands were quivering. She did not stop running. She had just witnessed a murder.

Rachael...

The morning was still young, the cool breeze swept through the room sending a shiver down her spine. She drew her blanket to cover herself  properly. Rachael tossed and turned on the bed but was not willing to get up. She could feel the softness of her bed and the soothing effect it gave her. It felt like her little heaven. The previous day had been a tough one. She had fought with her mother again. Well, that had become a constant event in the house and she was not going to beat herself about it. She turned to the left side of the bed where her electronic clock was. It was just 5:30am. She should have been up by 5am if she wanted to catch up on chores and meet up with Eric for the rest of the day.

The thought of Eric made her giggle. The young man had stolen her heart and she wished he would keep it in his care for as long as he willed. People misunderstood him but she knew him better than anyone else. People judged him and criticized him but she understood him. She loved him. Her mother would never understand. Why can't people understand that Eric meant no harm to her. He cared about her and she believed it. He drank a little and partied hard but hey! it was not as bad as people made it look like. Who doesn't like a little fun?

Eric was having a tough relationship with his very demanding father and the way he blew off steam was with a bottle. He was at least a lot calmer after he had his fill. Eric's father was to blame but in the society, elders are always right. "I have my own life to live and my own decisions to make. If people don't like it, then they can escort themselves to hell". Rachael thought. She would not allow her mother run her life or dictate what should be in it and not be. "I am eighteen and old enough to make my own decisions." She got out of her bed and stretched with a loud yawn. The day was going to be good. She went to the bathroom with a smile. A smile of love... She was in love!

Marian sat on her sofa just opposite her bed. The bed lamp was on and she began to wonder if she should repaint her room. She watched the curtains lift themselves up and gently come down as the wind kept coming in. It was a chilly morning but she doubted the wind was the cause of the chill she felt in her heart. Rachael defied her every chance she got. She felt this terrible fear that crippled her anytime she thought about her daughter's decisions. Her own life flashed before her. Her daughter was going down the same path she went. She remembered David and how she loved the bad boy in him. She would sneak out the window to see him to avoid her father's trouble and sneak back into her room in the early hours of the morning. She enjoyed the adventures with David. The rides and parties they had enjoyed made her forget all her worries. Well, momentarily. She loved that he prefered her to the other girls in school. She was not the prettiest in school, her father prevented her from using make up and so she felt so privileged that David would choose her despite her low income status and not so pretty face. Her father sold newspapers and did not make much. Her brother was serving in the military and was far from home. Marian remembered all the fun she had with David and how she felt true freedom.

In David's embrace she felt free. Her father was just a pain in her neck. It was like he followed her every move. Never really allowing her breathe or even do what other girls did; like go to cinemas, parties, and just have fun at sleepovers. In the evenings, he would make her read the Bible to him. She would read from one chapter to another till he fell asleep. God allowed her father live like a pauper and yet her father served Him with zeal. Her father had suffered too much. Her mother had left him to marry some rich sailor because she said his Bible would drown him in poverty. She knew in her heart that she blamed her father for her mother's actions. Maybe that was why she wanted to stay with David. David's father was a well known business man and if she could get along with David well enough, he might just marry her out of the poverty she has been cursed with. David was her saviour. The twists of life showed her how wrong she was.

She jumped out of her reverie when she heard a knock on her door. "Mum, I need the keys to the shop to clean it before the day brightens up". Rachael stood with arms akimbo as Marian opened the door. Marian went in and opened the drawer by her bed to get the keys. "Did you sleep well?" Marian asked her daughter. "Yes. I did" Rachael answered as she took the keys from her mother without looking at her and walked away. "I am going to lose my daughter." Marian whispered and caught a tear before it flowed down her cheek. It was too late, her other eye betrayed her. She allowed her tears flow freely and closed her door.

Less complaining, More Thanking...

It is so easy to see what is wrong with the world and everything around and not remember that life is a mixture of the good and the bad. We always have reasons to get angry and critical over matters but if we decide to really look deep, we will discover that life still has beauty in the midst of so much ugliness. In school; at home, at work or wherever we find ourselves we must learn to appreciate the good things we have.

Your father may not always be around when you need him but at least, you have a father. So many people will give anything to have a father figure. School isn't as fun as you would want it to be but believe me, some people would die just to have a sneak peek into a classroom. Your mum tends to use a whole tablespoon full of salt in her meals but at least she is cooking! Complaining comes easy but recently, I am beginning to see complaining as a sign of weakness.

It is a sign of weakness because those who complain never really do anything and it seems like the easiest thing to do rather than change the situation by actually doing something. We complain about everything and forget that life is so large and everyone has a part to play in it. Anyway, Lets come back home to the crux of this discussion. I want to appeal to you to be more grateful for your little blessings. And if we really look at them honestly, they are not little. God is faithful to His children and wants us to have a heart filled with gratitude.

So next time you want to complain, remember your blessings. Remember that after every rain comes sunshine. You are alive and at the best time of your life. Being young is such a blessing! You have a lot ahead of you and for you. Life is beautiful. Despite all your problems be more grateful that you are not there alone. God is there with you and will see you through. Less Complaining, choose to go down the road of gratitude!

Leave me alone!

I hear you loud and clear! That moment when you just want your parents to stop breathing down your neck with what you should do and not do. Believe me, it's not easy being where you are because parents don't know that you are no longer a 'child' and you think you are an adult and they don't see you in that way at all. Can't they just leave you to do your own thing and be your own person? Well, they could but they won't. Well, maybe not now...
No matter how grown you might look; muscular, six-packed, bearded, tall or if you are a lady, fully developed on all sides and even in the early stages of University, you will always be their child. I always tell teens, you will understand when you are a parent.

Every parent is protective of their child and wants what is best for them. Their approach might not always be the best but the more you understand they love you, it is easier to tolerate them. Truth is this, you really don't want to be left alone. Anyone who is alone will tell you they crave some sort of company and wish they had someone who could help them take decisions. God does not intend for anyone to be alone. Life is about people, friendship and bonding. The first bond you had is with your family and it will still be the strongest bond.

Parents are there to guide and provide the right counsel. Avoid telling yourself that you don't need anybody. Life gets cruel and you need someone to help you through those times. You need your parents to help you make the right choices. You need their advice on schools to pick or any other academic pursuit. The devil will take advantage of your aloneness. The Bible records that in the multitude of counsel, there is safety (Prov 11:14). We need not just our parents but good friends. When God created Adam, He said, it was not good for man to be alone. Though that scripture is quoted during weddings, God lets us know that man needs people around. Your parents, siblings and friends are the people God has put around you to help you.

Asserting your independence doesn't mean alienating people from your life  but knowing that while the ultimate decision lies with you, you need them to make you see things from different angles and your decisions are better informed. At this stage, you know a lot but not all. Don't fall for that lie of the enemy that you don't need anyone. You need God because without Him, you can do absolutely nothing and you need godly people. Whatever you do, don't be alone!

You have a right to be angry!

We all get upset at some point. If you have siblings who can't stop getting on your nerves or parents who never know how to talk without shouting, then you very well know what it means to be upset. Being upset is normal. In fact, if you do not get angry or upset, then we will be concerned. It is part of the human condition in fact, even God gets angry. Jesus got angry and drove the buyers and sellers out of the temple. So, it is not a sin to be upset or angry over things you do not like.

However, how we react during those moments is what is key. I have been talking about how we should handle issues that confront us in situations when the home is broken and I know that everyone has a fair share of problems whether at home or in school. You have every right to be angry but not to remain angry. I always ask a question, what would happen if God always stayed angry with man because we deserve His anger, if we want to be fair. He was so angry with man that He wiped them away from the face of the earth and kept only Noah and his family. Despite God's anger, He still found it in His heart to love man.

Things will always get you upset and angry but it is not wise to take them so much to heart that you become resentful and bitter. It is not even healthy. Malice and bitterness are not the kind of feelings you should nurse because they grow into very unpleasant things like depression, violence and even promiscuity. If you have a friend who has made it a constant assignment to make you angry, ask God to help you manage such friends. You could try to find out more about them because a lot of them are acting out their own pain too. Some may be hurt deep down inside that they find it difficult to relate with other people. If you would ask God for wisdom, you might just be surprised that they are not as bad as you think. Do things for them even when they did not ask for it. Love breaks people. Ask anywhere, it is so true.

If the friend still is unresponsive, love them from a distance because your emotional well-being is important too. Avoid relationships that weigh you down more than they lift you up especially after you have put in your best to make the relationship work. God understands when you are upset. He understands when you just want to punch the walls and break the chairs and that is why you can go to Him and ask Him to help your heart. God loves you!

Not my parent!

So we have been talking about how we can manage our reactions when we are in broken homes. Today, I would want to talk about those step parents that are not nice. I first started in my previous post 'Evil' Steps that no one can really take the place of your biological parents because no two people are the same. However, I will not pretend that I do not know that there are some step parents who do not even try their best to love or take care of you. Most times, you find yourself wondering how to handle the situation. It becomes terrible when your biological parent in the marriage doesn't believe you or just think you are whiny and seeking attention.

If you are a christian in a Bible believing church, please I beg you to seek counsel from your pastor or relevant authorities. Do not die in silence especially if there is any kind of abuse going on. I would also suggest that you do not pay evil with evil. There is a strong temptation to fight back when we feel oppressed or angry. That is very normal. However, as teens that belong first to Christ, we should do what Christ did. He did not repay the evil men did to him by sending down angels to strike them dead. He did not fight back during the times of humiliation. This does not in anyway show stupidity, it simply shows the wisdom of God because good always wins.

Every time you want to retaliate, think of Jesus and His response to the people who wanted to kill Him. Respect your parents no matter how hard it can be. It is a biblical injunction and the God promises you long life if you obey your parents even your step parents inclusive. Avoid trouble with them the best way you can. You won't be in that house forever. Do not talk back at them and this is when you will have to learn self-control which is a fruit of the Spirit (Gal 5:22).

It is important you allow this process draw you closer to God because He is the greatest father; He promises to be the father to the fatherless and a mother to the motherless. Lean on Him for support. Pray and pray and again I say pray. Ask God to help you love them and give you strength to carry on. He is the one that lifts those who are bowed down (Psalm 145:14). I will also advise that you get engaged in something productive that keeps you busy because lonely moments can be depressing. Join good clubs, read good books, take a vocation class or whatever and keep yourself busy. Have a 'Can do' attitude because you can do all things through Christ who gives you strength. You will go through this and come out stronger.

For personal counsel, reach me through my email: onomeonwah@gmail.com. I will be glad to personally respond to your questions.